ANONYMOUS INTERVIEW #2
On June 15th 2013, we at HUMANZOO hosted a fundraiser for our Production of Normal by Anthony Neilson. During the party, in a small room upstairs Garry conducted a series of interviews which were audio recorded. The recordings were then transcribed word for word.
This was one of the interviews.
/ indicates an overlapping of text
… indicates a pause or hesitation.
[NAME] indicates a name mentioned that has been censored for anonymity
GARRY:
Ok, I just want to get you to start off by describing your current emotional, what your current emotional state is.
Human:
Today?
GARRY:
Right now in this moment.
Human:
Um… Uh, my outlook is very positive. Uh I’m in a pretty good mood today because uh the reason I’m here is because [NAME] is showing art in a space I own and live in so we organized this art show with her and [NAME] and um three other artists. And it went really well last night and uh that was pretty exciting /so…
GARRY:
/Great. Congratulations. And she invited you here today.
Human:
Yes.
GARRY:
Great. Um, are you male or female?
Human: Male.
GARRY:
Do you have any siblings?
Human:
Mhm.
GARRY:
How many?
Human:
One.
GARRY:
One sibling, and are your parents still alive?
Human:
My mother is still alive.
GARRY:
Before your father passed away were they together? /Were they still married?
Human:
/Mhm, yeah.
GARRY:
Do you identify with the saying or the idea an ‘eye for an eye’?
Human:
No.
GARRY:
Not under any circumstances?
Human:
Um, uh, maybe under some circumstances but as a general rule…
GARRY:
Ok. Do you know your blood type?
Human:
Mmm no, I don’t think so.
GARRY:
Do you think it’s…
Human:
I think it’s type O, but I’m not sure.
GARRY:
Um, I’m wondering if you can describe what the word ‘normal’ means to you.
Human:
Uh… I guess normal means what you would expect in a given situation from a person or a thing uh and if something doesn’t correspond to your expectations then it wouldn’t be normal. In terms of, in social terms I find it a bit of a repressive term.
GARRY:
Mhm.
Human:
And I don’t gravitate to the concept of normal personally. /(Chuckles)
GARRY:
/Does that mean that you, does that mean that you wouldn’t ever describe yourself as ‘normal’?
Human:
I would (chuckles) I would never describe myself as normal.
(We share a laugh)
GARRY:
Um, what’s the earliest childhood memory or image that comes to mind?
Human:
Watching one of the moon landings on black and white on TV.
GARRY:
Do you remember how old you were?
Human:
No, and I’m not even 100% sure it’s my earliest memory, but it’s, because I thought, would I remember something from 1969? I was born in 1967, and I don’t think so. There was also one in 1971 I think and it was probably that one so I was three I guess.
GARRY:
And um, when you were a child what was your desired profession, or what did you want to be when you grew up?
Human:
I wanted to be a writer and I think everyone thought I was going to be a writer. Uh, and I still am to some extent but it’s not my dream anymore exactly.
GARRY:
What changed?
Human:
Um I don’t know, I mean I, I’m not, I don’t gravitate necessarily to doing things that people expect or want me do. That’s part of it to be honest /um and uh…
GARRY:
/mhm, mhm.
Human:
I don’t know I just discovered a lot of other things that I was interested in or had a /a talent for…
GARRY:
Right…
Human:
There are things that I didn’t think that I would be able to do professionally or in a serious, or publicly (inaudible) that I did turn out to be able to do.
GARRY:
Would you describe yourself as defiant?
Human:
In some situations, yeah. Although not as a general rule.
GARRY:
Um, do you think it’s possible to justify murder?
Human:
Uh, well my immediate response is no. (chuckles)
GARRY:
Instinctually.
Human:
Yeah, um…
GARRY:
But rationally?
Human:
Well people justify war for example which I think could properly be seen as murder and say you know during World War II if Britain, if the allies decided not to respond to the Nazi threat then that obviously would’ve been worse (small chuckle) for the world.
GARRY:
Responding for the greater good.
Human:
Yeah. I mean certainly there are situations where people are gonna get killed that are justified but on a certain individual level I don’t.
GARRY:
What um, what scares you most about life?
Human:
Uh, mmm I don’t think I am a particularly fearful person.
GARRY:
If there’s nothing that comes to mind immediately that’s fine as well.
Human:
Um, uh well probably, huh I don’t know, yeah, (chuckles, then, to himself) what scares me most about life?
GARRY:
If you think of it later you can come back to it if something else comes up. Um, if you were going to write a book, perhaps you already have, what would it be about?
Human:
Um, I, because I’m a writer I think about what I might write a book about. The idea I have that I might pursue uh in the foreseeable future would be to write about the indie rock scene in the middle of the last decade in Toronto, /various people I know, I wouldn’t be writing…
GARRY:
/Oh.
Human:
…a non-fiction book, it would be a /fictionalized account…
GARRY:
/Right.
Human:
…people touring in vans, being addicted to various substances.
GARRY:
Do you have any addictions?
Human:
Mmm no. Uh, well not to substances (chuckles) I’m trying to think if I’m addicted to anything else, I really like to do yoga every morning.
GARRY:
That’s a really great addiction. (We share a laugh)
Human:
I think so.
GARRY:
Um, have you ever suspected someone you know of having committing a very serious crime… such as murder, or rape, that kind of thing?
Human:
No.
GARRY:
No.
Human:
(Small chuckle)
GARRY:
Um, do you have any fetishes that you’d be willing to share or talk about?
Human:
Well, I’m not a particularly fetishy kind of guy. As these things go my ex works as the manager of the [local leather bar] in [the city], one of the managers , so it’s funny to go in there because they have puppy night and rubber night and (laughs) piss play and it’s fetish central so I’m pretty familiar with that world but…
GARRY:
But does it interest you at all?
Human:
There are certain things that interest me, bondage and stuff like that that to me is an extension of what I like, sexually speaking, I assume you’re talking about sexual fetishes.
GARRY:
I am. Or if there’s anything else that comes to mind I’m open to hearing about it.
Human:
Well nothing else comes to mind. I’m not, I’m not, I don’t tend to fetishize a lot of the conventional things, like leather doesn’t do anything for me, and other things are just things you do to have a good time, sexually, that society may see as fetishes but they don’t necessarily, though I can’t think of what I’m talking about right now. (Laughs)
GARRY:
Um, do you trust our legal system?
Human:
Not really.
GARRY:
If someone you knew and loved were committed of a very serious crime, such as murder or rape, armed robbery or assault, do you think that you could still love them.
Human:
Yeah… Mhm, yeah.
GARRY:
What does the word evil mean to you?
Human:
Sorry, let me go back and /qualify the last answer…
GARRY:
Sure, certainly, certainly.
Human:
…if it were something, to me murder, for example, to me murder and rape are not really in the same category.
GARRY:
Sure.
Human:
If I knew somebody had committed a rape I would not want anything more to do with that, I think there are certain murders, I mean, things, killings that are qualified as murders that happen more or less accidentally, people get into a fight or whatever and somebody ends up, I can easily see that a lot of murders are not intended to happen as murders, and that would be in a different category for me.
GARRY:
Mhm.
Human:
I’ve never known of that to happen. (small chuckle)
GARRY:
/So…
Human: /(Two loud sneezes)
GARRY:
…Bless you.
Human:
Thanks.
GARRY:
Do you think that um, let’s go back to the definition of evil, for you, does that mean anything?
Human:
Um, I’ve thought about it. And I’m not a person who tends to really, I haven’t sort of experienced evil and I don’t tend to, I’m not religious and I don’t believe in sort of black and white religious dichotomies (inaudible) the Christian, sort of, concept of good and evil. Um, I think a lot of what is called ‘evil’ is often committed in the name of good, for example with religions again and their various purges, evil, what is ‘evil’ for one group of people is just what another group of people wants.
GARRY:
Um, do you, do you think that, I guess in a more specific context, do you think that some one person can be born ‘evil,’ or be influenced by a social context within a society that deems one thing ‘evil’ and another thing ‘good’?
Human:
I tend to think not but I don’t know for a fact, it’s possible, um I think people are born with (sigh) well they may, you see they may not even be born that way I think your very early experiences with you parents or whatever can mold you like before you’re even one year old for example, I think early childhood is very important so people uh may be influenced to um or they may not get the love or whatever that they need to be sort of emotionally uh, I want to say conventional but sort of /emotionally healthy…
GARRY:
/Balanced?
Human:
Balanced yeah. Um and so I think what happens in early life is very important but also later life in terms of what people end up doing with what they’re given.
GARRY:
Right. Do you believe in karma?
Human:
(Chuckles) Uh, karma. I’ve done a lot of reading of eastern religions especially when I was younger, that’s where the yoga comes in. I think karma is a pretty good thing to keep in mind whether, the literal sort of spiritual sort of, whether it’s actually universal law or not is not something I can comment on because there’s no way to verify that but there’s plenty of evidence that karma is a good rule to live by day to day, if you do good things good things often come back to you.
GARRY:
So as a personal philosophy.
Human:
Yeah, or just as a rule of contact.
GARRY:
Yeah. That a good way of putting it. Gonna check the time… (pause) ok. I have an ultimatum for you. Would you rather lose all of your previous memories, or never be able form new memories?
Human:
I’d rather lose all my memories.
GARRY:
And still be able to form new ones. Um what about a superpower? If you could have any super power what would it be?
Human:
(Small chuckle) The first one that comes to mind is the ability to fly because that’s always so enjoyable in dreams but I don’t think it would be terribly useful. Um, I’m not sure I would really want a superpower. (More chuckling)
GARRY:
Not at all? Are you afraid of power?
Human:
Maybe I am to some extent, but I also just think that when things, when your life experience is disrupted by even, it could be something bad, it could be something good, it just could be quite difficult to deal with, like people winning the lottery…
GARRY:
Which is a blessing that people wish for for a long time.
Human:
Yeah, quite often a mixed blessing when it actually happens so I can’t yeah I can’t think besides flying, I can’t…
GARRY:
That’s fair, that’s a superpower. If you could ask ME any question right now, what would you ask me?
Human:
Um, well, what do you, what do you, what form is this project gonna take, that you’re working on gonna take?
GARRY:
Hm, and what makes you smile?
Human:
What right now?
GARRY:
Or one specific thing that makes you smile?
Human:
Things that I find absurd make me smile, like lately working on art when I do something, I created a sculpture that I decided not to put in the show because it was about the other artists and not about me and I didn’t have time to do a good job with it. I have this silver box which [NAME] has sat on.
GARRY:
Mhm.
Human:
Uh, (chuckles) which normally has a seat that moves back and forth when you flick on a switch it’s a very weird thing from like fifty years ago, and I attached a some silver ductwork to it, so it was kind of, so it makes this little rumbling sound, so I was, when I got that going for the first time for example it made me laugh because it was so absurd and ridiculous.
GARRY:
Great.
Human:
(Hearty laugh)
GARRY:
Um, do you think that you will actually go to see the HUMANZOO performance of ‘Normal’ in the Hamilton Fringe purely, not because I’m trying to convince you, but to find out what your feelings are at this point in time.
Human:
Sorry to find out, you want to know my feelings about…
GARRY:
If you’re going to go see it.
Human:
I think I am I live [ ]. (Chuckling)
GARRY:
So it’s accessible.
Human:
It would be silly of me not to.
GARRY:
Could you describe your current emotional state?
Human:
Yeah. I’m feeling good, I think I’m feeling better now than I was at the beginning of the interview because I like to talk about things that one doesn’t normally talk about.
GARRY:
Great.
Human:
We’re done.
GARRY:
We’re done. May I hug you?
Human:
Sure, I like hugging too.
GARRY:
Thank you very, very much.
GARRY:
Thank you, Garry.
HUMANZOO 